Listen

I've felt like I need to post from my journal lately, so here is another one for you. I wrote it last month. Just something God impressed upon my heart.

Don't give up on yourself, and don't give up on God. He's HERE. RIGHT NOW. He never left your side. And He never will leave you. Give yourself a chance to sit still. Soak Him in. Sit in His presence. LISTEN. Wait. No talking allowed. You've asked. Now listen & wait, because He'll answer. He promised that when you seek Him, you'll find Him. When you ask, you'll receive. When you knock, the door will be opened. So then. It's really only a matter of time. You're ready, right? You're open and willing to receive whatever He chooses to give you? You're willing to act when He calls you? To go wherever and whenever He leads? Sometimes it seems so bleak. Distant. But don't let it get you down. Fight to keep close to God. He's never left your side. He believes in you, and loves you way to much for words to begin to describe. So don't give up on yourself. He's right by your side. Ask, and then listen. Be still, and wait for Him. He's HERE. Now. Let Him speak to your heart & draw you closer to Him.

He's waiting for you to listen.

Moldova

I'm going to be posting a few different times about my trip to Moldova to give you a visual of what it was like. First things first. The culture.

Let me give you a background...my good friend Kalyna, her husband Patrick, and their 3 small boys moved to Moldova this past summer to be missionaries and work with victims of sex trafficking at a safe home there. Really awesome and it was so neat to be able to go visit them and see what life is like for them. The culture is very different, very Russian, and because Moldova is a former Soviet country, when you go out in public, no one smiles and it seems like almost everyone is wearing black. This is because when they were under Soviet rule, they were only allowed to wear 3 colors -- black, white, and grey -- so even today, the culture seems void of color, save for the few younger people we'd see every once in a while, bucking the trend and wearing a splash of bright color. When out in public in the Soviet era, if anyone had any expression on their face, they could be targeted for whatever reason. So everyone went outside with a deadpan, almost bored expression, which has become an ingrained part of their culture today. It took me a while to figure it out until the 2nd day in, when after traveling around on public transportation for long enough, I just wanted someone to smile at me (Picture me trying to fit in while out in public, not smiling. You're right. It didn't work very well!). :) But...Moldovans are extremely friendly and hospitable people. It was a very interesting piece of their culture to notice, though.

A real battle

There is a real spiritual battle going on all around us. Praise God that it's invisible, or I've come to realize that all of us would be so shaken to the core we wouldn't be able to function. It's too much for our human minds to grasp. But it is VERY REAL and should be take VERY SERIOUSLY. It should not be ignored. In the book I'm reading, Spiritual Warfare and Missions, they make some very interesting statements. On page 33, they say:

Could it be possible that someone would really be at work to send people to hell? Satan would prefer us to be ashamed at his existence and put him in the category of mythology. We underestimate our enemy and accuser when God's Word is sadly embraced as a book of anecdotal, sweet stories with solid advice on how to make good decisions. Although on a macro level the Bible assures us we win, we skip the details of the gruesome confrontations along the way to victory.

 AND

They (the disciples) learned that one size did not fit all in their confrontations with darkness. Faith in God gives a disciple authority to confront because he knows he does not fight Satan in his own strength. Our inappropriate fear of the devil can be traced to our lack of confidence in God's ability, not ours.

WOW. The spiritual world is very real and battles are fought every day. And I think for those of us who are missions minded, it's an even bigger deal because when we go on the mission field, we are absolutely SURE to encounter it. Because Satan does not want us to go and spread God's Word and tell the world of His love for them. Satan wants everyone to stay deceived by the lies he's conceived. Religions so close to the truth yet just off, so they seem right and so gain followers, convinced they are on the right road, when in fact these poor people couldn't be farther from it. So close, yet so far. It's so sad. And it builds up this righteous anger within me. I have friends dealing with some pretty heavy spiritual attacks. And the reason I know they're spiritual is because they manifest themselves in an almost physical way, and consume my dear friends so much that they can hardly stand against it. That's when I have come to realize God's great plan for my friends. Satan doesn't want them to move forward, so he comes against them in the strongest way he knows how - fear. AND HE HAS NO PLACE NEAR US. HE IS NOT ALLOWED. IN JESUS' NAME! It's righteous anger that builds inside of me. As sons and daughters of the Most High God, Satan cannot touch us. But He will try to get as close as He can. It's a very real battle. One that is most definitely NOT of flesh and blood. One that is fought with prayer and seeking God and letting Him fight for us, knowing He is protecting us and that we are His. The battle is won. But it is not over yet. So the devil will keep fighting. And we must keep fighting and realize the reality of it. We cannot lose sight of it. It is SO important.

And in the midst of this, it is good to realize how essential it is to be intentional about our relationship with God. It really struck me, on page 36, where they say:

Satan does not have to tempt us to embrace sinful living that would destroy our witness. All he has to do is divert our focus.

Wow. And it hit me. He is very good at diverting our focus. Think about how much time we spend on Facebook versus spending time reading His Word. Just an observation in my life - that's something I struggle with. It is amazing when you think about it, isn't it? The battle is real. When we all realize that, God's kingdom will advance even farther.

On page 44 of the book, it says:

We are told, "Be sober! Be on the alert! Your adversary the Devil is prowling around like a roaring lion, looking for anyone he can devour. Resist him, firm in the faith" (1 Pet. 5:8-9). Our enemy is not a house pet who likes to nip at our heels. He is not even satisfied with trying to trip us up with temptation and occasional trivial sins. He seeks our total destruction...He will do whatever he can to thwart God's people from fulfilling God's mission.

But God is BIGGER. He is more powerful. And through Him we have authority over Satan and the powers of darkness. We, not through ourselves, but through God, who enables and empowers us. God's mission and plan will prevail. But it is a real battle, and we need to be aware of it. To Him be the Glory and Power and Honor, FOREVER, Amen!

Obedience

We are called to it. We really struggle with it. Or maybe I'm the only one who does? :-P But obedience is one of those things that are absolutely necessary to our walk with Christ. The road we walk on is going to be filled with plenty of ups and downs. More than we'd like, I think. But Jesus tells us to follow him. To walk with Him. He's told me more than once to take his hand, walk with him because he knows the way, and to not look back no matter what we're leaving behind, because while earthly things call our name and might look nice, or maybe earthly struggles try to maintain their grip on us, what Jesus has for us is far better than anything we can imagine. He knows every step. He knows every pebble on the road, all the dust we'll encounter, all the hills and valleys and twists and turns, and in fact, He knows it so well that He could walk the road blindfolded. So I choose to trust Him and be obedient in following Him, because He obviously knows best and knows what's ahead so much better than I ever could.

Questioning

Do you ever have days where you question everything about your life? Everything you've done, motives, everything you want to do, why you want to do that or shouldn't do that, etc? Do you ever have to constantly remind yourself who it is who's really in control...and that it's God and NOT you?

Do you ever have days where you yearn for something that you might be working towards but don't have a way of doing yet? Do you ever question your faith, or at least the heart and motive behind it?

Just wondering. Because I do.

And God has told me quite clearly. Stop questioning. When you know you're supposed to act, do it. Don't question it. Why NOT do it if you know it's from me? Why not take advantage of the opportunities before you to be My light to those around you? Why not? Why wouldn't you? Don't let the world get in the way. Don't worry about what the world thinks. Why should you care? It's Me you're doing this for. And I'm very proud of you. More proud than you can realize. I am with You. Do NOT be afraid. My rod and my staff will comfort you. I will provide. Rest under the shadow of my wings, trust in my mighty arm to hold you up. Speak my name. Show my love. Shine my light. I am with you always. Be not afraid, for I love you, darling child. You are mine and I am yours. Unmistakable is our love. So stop questioning. Haven't I shown you already in many different ways that I am with you?